Townsend Davis had been married for more than a decade when his wife, Brigid, was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease. Their lives changed immediately. Townsend became Brigid’s caregiver, sorting her medication day after day, making their home accessible, and finding someone to look after her while he worked and raised their sons. He was committed to Brigid, and wanted to be there for her as her condition progressed.

One day, not long after her diagnosis, Brigid told Townsend she wanted him eventually to find a new partner. But Townsend couldn’t imagine it. Searching for another love seemed too complicated, and he was focused on caring for Brigid and raising their family.

Then, years later, Townsend met Deb.

On this episode of Modern Love, Townsend explains what it was like to forge a new partnership as he remained married to Brigid, and what happened when he brought his wife and his girlfriend together for a Thanksgiving dinner.

This episode is adapted from Townsend’s Modern Love essay from 2024, "A Family Dinner With My Wife and Girlfriend."

Modern Love is looking for your stories! We’re working on an episode about the dating memories you want to forget. We want to know: What was the worst date you went on this year? What happened? And what are you trying to do differently when it comes to love in the new year? Whether you’re singled or partnered, tell us about your bad dates. Send us your story by recording a voice memo and emailing it to modernlovepodcast@nytimes.com. Please include your name and where you’re based. You might hear your voice on a future episode of Modern Love.

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