Best Attachmentstyles Podcasts (2025)

1
What Is Individuation And Why We Need To Do It 2:01

25d ago2:01

2:01

There's a particular frustration many people experience on their healing journey. They've done extensive work on themselves. Read the books on attachment theory. Attended the workshops on communication. Polarity programs galore.Invested in the therapy sessions. Mastered the art of recognizing their patterns. Yet somehow, (even the therapists I talk…

1
How to Interrupt the Fawn Response 46:14

29d ago46:14

46:14

Fawning as a trauma response is something I see so often in my work-people saying yes when they mean no, over-accommodating to avoid conflict, and ultimately losing themselves in the process. I know this pattern well because I've lived it, and breaking free from it changed everything for me. In this conversation with Michelle Chalafant, I dive deep…

1
𝗪𝗛𝗬 𝗪𝗢𝗠𝗘𝗡 𝗞𝗘𝗘𝗣 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗡𝗔𝗥𝗖𝗜𝗦𝗦𝗜𝗦𝗧𝗜𝗖 𝗠𝗘𝗡 𝗢𝗩𝗘𝗥 𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗢𝗩𝗘𝗥 2:06

1M ago2:06

2:06

Are you tired of attracting narcissistic men into your life, only to find yourself stuck in a cycle of toxic relationships? It's time to break free from this pattern and discover the underlying reasons why you keep attracting these types of men. In this video, we'll explore how unresolved trauma and poor emotional regulation can lead to a lack of h…

1
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐋 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐓𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐬 1:46

1M ago1:46

1:46

Why do you keep choosing toxic partners? It’s not just about attracting them—it’s about being attracted to them. This deep-rooted pattern stems from unresolved anxious attachment and a fear of abandonment. In this short but powerful video, I break down how your avoidant tendencies push away your emotions, creating a blind spot that keeps you stuck …

1
From Soulmates To Cellmates: The Dark Side of Love 2:04

1M ago2:04

2:04

In this video, we explore the phenomenon where initial 'soulmate' connections transform into confining 'cellmate' relationships. Discover how powerful first impressions can sometimes be rooted in unresolved traumas, leading to patterns that mirror our primary attachments. By understanding trauma bonds, we can break free from these cycles and foster…

1
What is Projection and how it shows up in relationships 2:24

2M ago2:24

2:24

If there was one thing I wished more people struggling with conflict in relationships understood, it’s this: IT’S NEVER ABOUT WHAT IT’S ABOUT. The disagreement? It’s only the tip of the iceberg. What’s really happening is something much deeper— a projection, like a movie playing on a screen. But the drama isn’t on the screen. It’s inside the projec…

1
How Dads Help Build Secure Attachments in Children 1:45

3M ago1:45

1:45

I was talking with Dr. Russ about parenting, and something hit me like a ton of bricks: Our kids don’t just inherit our genes— they inherit our patterns. Let that sink in for a moment. Your child doesn’t just pick up your smile or your laugh. They pick up your unresolved wounds, your triggers, and the ways you’ve learned (or failed) to self-regulat…

1
How I Became Emotionally Trigger-Proof: Shoshanna's Transformation Story 2:25

3M ago2:25

2:25

If you’ve spent years on personal growth— books, seminars, courses, even therapy— and still find yourself struggling with the same patterns, you’re not alone. I know this because I was there too. Landmark. NLP. Polarity courses. Masculine/Feminine communication workshops. Byron Katie. John Demartini. You name it, I’d tried it. I spent hundreds of t…

1
Where Our Dysfunctional Relationship With Our Emotions Come From 2:53

3M ago2:53

2:53

Parents who admit to already having a dysfunctional relationship with their own emotions, have been asking me about their challenges with their children. This led me to want to bring something to your attention if you’re a parent who cares about raising healthy and resilient children. When your child comes to you with tears in their eyes, do you fi…

1
What Secure Relationships Feel Like 1:29

3M ago1:29

1:29

It’s sad. Truly sad. Most people wouldn’t recognize a secure relationship if it showed up with a neon sign saying, “No Drama Here.” Why? Because when all you’ve known is trauma bonds, longing, and anxiety, push and pull, you start mistaking chaos for connection, and secure love will be too uncomfortable, and you’ll push it away. That intensity you …

1
The One Feeling That Blocks Intimacy And Vulnerability 1:41

3M ago1:41

1:41

Vulnerability and intimacy. These are the two things most of us crave in relationships, yet they feel as elusive as trying to catch smoke with your hands. Why? Because of one sneaky little feeling that hijacks our connections and blocks our ability to show up authentically: Shame. Shame is the silent saboteur of intimacy. It’s the thing that keeps …

1
The Root Of Relationship Breakdowns 1:30

3M ago1:30

1:30

If you’re paying attention, relationship breakdowns will follow a specific pattern. The same conflict. The same arguments. The same heartbreak. Whether it’s your marriage, your dating life, or even the way you show up for your friends, these breakdowns carry a familiar sting: Feeling like you give too much and get nothing in return. Wondering if yo…

1
It’s Not Depression It’s Something Else 2:12

4M ago2:12

2:12

When you’re in dorsal vagal shutdown, your thoughts turn dark. • “What’s the point?” • “I’ll never get it right.” • “Nobody wants me anyway.” • “I’ll reject myself before they can do it.” It’s a quiet war that nobody sees. You isolate not because you want to— but because it feels safer. Safer to abandon yourself first… before someone else does. Saf…

1
Choosing The Right Guide To Help You With Masculine Feminine Dynamics 2:44

4M ago2:44

2:44

When I first started learning about polarity in relationships, it sounded like the magic bullet. Masculine. Feminine. Polarity equals attraction, right? Except, what if your relationship feels more like “push-pull” chaos than magnetic connection? What if you find yourself overthinking every interaction, walking on eggshells, or pretending to be som…

1
Emotional Literacy 2:06

4M ago2:06

2:06

Imagine this: You’re in a relationship that feels more like a minefield than a safe space. • You wake up wondering, “What mood will they be in today?” • A single word, a glance, or even silence sends your nervous system spiraling. • You’re constantly tiptoeing around triggers, theirs and yours. • Conflict feels unbearable— so you either avoid it or…

1
Why We Keep Repeating The Same Patterns In Relationship 2:24

4M ago2:24

2:24

Women initiate 70% of divorces. After speaking to these women, I discovered 3 reasons why. She’s fed up. She’s tired. She’s feeling alone (even if you’ve been married for decades). I’ve even spoken to women who confessed they were wanting to have an affair. If you’re a successful man who’s a good provider— with a woman who’s bitter, resentful, angr…

1
Fear of Abandonment Resolved 2:37

5M ago2:37

2:37

Curtis is a good-looking dude. When I see his Instagram videos—shirt off, abs on display— I admit I get a pang of jealousy. My dad bod under this shirt doesn’t compare. But looks only get you so far. Despite having no problem attracting women, Curtis faced one consistent issue: He got friend-zoned. Within months. Like clockwork. He did all the “wor…

1
How Enmeshment Destroys Relationships 2:33

5M ago2:33

2:33

Losing yourself in a relationship doesn’t feel good. This is why our avoidant parts show up: To protect ourselves from losing ourselves. I was there-- wanting connection, but not knowing how to connect without losing myself— and being overwhelmed by my partners feelings, and trapped in their moods. That’s when I discovered what “enmeshment" was. Le…

1
How To Get Your Man To Finally Step Up And Do The Work 2:04

5M ago2:04

2:04

Nobody likes facing their shadows. These darker parts of ourselves are buried in a ton of shame. Even though we get into relationships to connect, love, and build a home that feels safe and secure, without the right healing work, and lack of skills developed, relationships end up feeling like a prison. Their emotions and moods tend to infect yours.…

1
Setbacks in Healing Journey 2:40

5M ago2:40

2:40

Alicia, in tears, was wrestling with feelings of failure over her healing journey. The setbacks felt overwhelming, like all her progress had crumbled in an instant. She was drowning in self-judgment, unable to shake the guilt of her anxious attachment resurfacing. She loathed how she seemed to slip back into old habits—ruminating, jumping to conclu…

1
Attracting Weak Men 2:26

6M ago2:26

2:26

This is a note for women who are frustrated with the men they are with (or seem to attract— wondering if all men are “weak”.) Avoidant, weak men. Never in a million years would I have imagined writing an email like this. I’m a retired Chiropractor by training, not a psychotherapist. You can imagine my inner resistance to sharing what I’m about to s…

1
From Trauma Bond to Secure Attachment 2:36

6M ago2:36

2:36

I want to introduce you to Denise. Maybe you can relate to her story. "I am in a relationship that I am unhappy in, my partner doesn't even like me, let alone love me. He is always looking for something else, someone else, someone better, someone who will worship him and tolerate his poor behaviour and disrespect. He makes me feel so small and insi…

1
The Anxious Becomes The Avoidant 2:52

6M ago2:52

2:52

Jennifer was unable to have a successful, peaceful, secure romantic relationship without allowing her anxieties and insecurities to sabotage it and push her partner away. She has an anxious attachment style- constantly needing reassurance, constantly struggling with feelings of abandonment when her partner needs space and time, and although she is …

1
How You Trigger Avoidance in a Man 2:46

7M ago2:46

2:46

Over the past few weeks, I spoke to more than 30 women who identified as successful in work, (Bossbabes, if you will) who "didn’t need a man” to take care of them. Even though they considered themselves independent, many of them tearfully shared with me some of the struggles they were facing in their relationships. What I discovered was a “eureka” …

1
Why You Shouldn’t Eliminate Negative Emotions 2:23

7M ago2:23

2:23

“Dr. Nima, we walk on eggshells with each other. I am so sensitive to the slightest upset that when he is in a bad mood, I don’t know how to fix it. I constantly feel like a failure in this relationship. Can you help?” I just received this email from a subscriber, and it hit on one of the root causes of most toxic, insecure relationship patterns: S…

1
Signs of a Trauma Bonded Relationship 4:36

7M ago4:36

4:36

"Come close to me." "Get away from me." "I need you." "I need you to leave me alone." "I can’t live without you." "I can’t live like this anymore". These were soundbites from my last relationship. I didn’t know the term “Trauma Bond” but after being successful in every area of life except the most important (intimate relationship), I decided to do …

1
The Choice We Don’t Consciously Choose 2:26

7M ago2:26

2:26

Sally’s words hit me like a ton of bricks: ‘I wasn’t expecting that. This is going to take me a while to process. It’s no surprise—she had just completed her Overview Experience (OE) a few weeks ago, and let me tell you, this isn’t your average Zoom call. OE isn’t just another Saturday evening where you’re partying or sedating from the week. It’s a…

1
Why You Can’t Shortcut The Healing Process 2:00

7M ago2:00

2:00

If you’ve ever been stuck in the “loop of doom” in a relationship dynamic, you’ll understand this exhausting dance: After the honeymoon phase is finished, which lasts between up to 6 months to 18 months… you graduate to the next phase of the relationship, which is called the “power struggle” phase. Here’s what it looks like: You’re effected by thei…

1
A New Lens For Forgiveness 1:49

8M ago1:49

1:49

(Name changed to respect privacy and anonymity) (4 minute read). Amy was tired of feeling like a victim. Divorced with children, running a business, she was still walking around with a great deal of resentment. She had done YEARS of therapy, plant medicines, breathwork, inner child work…. Even taking courses on learning how to communicate more in h…

1
What I Wish I Could Say, But Can’t (because the truth hurts) 0:51

8M ago0:51

0:51

Hey, it’s time for some real talk. After countless calls with the people who have been consuming my content, reaching out for help in their current situation, I want to share with you what I wish I could say to them— but usually don’t, because let’s face it, the truth can sting. Here it is: Consider the possibility that you DON’T want to heal. Of c…

1
5 Common Traits in 30 Alpha Boss Women Struggling in Love 45:37

8M ago45:37

45:37

Over the past few weeks, I spoke to more than 30 women who identified as successful in work, (Bossbabes, if you will) who "didn’t need a man” to take care of them. Even though they considered themselves independent, many of them tearfully shared with me some of the struggles they were facing in their relationships. What I discovered was a “eureka” …

1
How Men Can Solve Their Partners Sxxual Resistance When She’s Not in The Mood 20:00

9M ago20:00

20:00

It’s the topic of so many comedy routines: “Not tonight— I have a headache.” Even though people joke about it, the impact of two lovers not sharing the same enthusiasm about sex is very real— to big blow outs in the middle of the night, to sexual shutdown or sexless marriages. On this short 20 minute video, a student of mine, Carissa Kelly and I do…

1
Where Men Drop The Ball 9:35

10M ago9:35

9:35

There’s no shortage of complaints about how men show up in relationships. We fear what we don’t understand. Most men don’t understand women. (And most women don’t understand men.) From a very young age, we ALSO get so many mixed messages. Be a man, don’t show emotions It’s not ok to feel angry Your anger is unwarranted (which will turn to rage) Suc…

1
Understanding the Push/pull dynamic 3:09

10M ago3:09

3:09

did you ever wonder why the push-pull dynamic keeps coming up in insecure relationship dynamics? It all makes perfect sense when you study the mechanism. Insecure (and exhausting) push-pull dynamics happen because we haven’t yet learned how to navigate the two primary attachment fears gone awry: 1) The Fear of Abandonment— being left behind, drifti…

1
How Do I Heal My Insecure Attachment 2:25

10M ago2:25

2:25

Unless you had unicorn parents, chances are that you follow a combination of two primary insecure attachment styles: Anxious (Ambivalent)— Think of a wave who constantly needs connection. Avoidant (Dismissive)— Think of an “island” who needs space. or a combination of the two (Disorganized AKA “Dismissive avoidant”) The problem with these tests and…

1
Why You Don't Know What You Want 4:44

11M ago4:44

4:44

It isn't normal to know what we want. It is a rare and difficult psychological achievement.” ― Abraham Maslow I remember it feeling like a panic in my system. I was in a crossroads of my life, wondering what’s next, and when someone asked me what I wanted, my response was “I have no clue what I want.” (The truth is, I did know-- I was just disconne…

1
I realized I Was The Problem 14:48

11M ago14:48

14:48

Have you heard the Taylor Swift song “Anti-Hero”? I remember the first time hearing it and was blown away. “I’ll stare directly in the sun but never in the mirror” was one of my favorite lines of all time in a song, because it captured what I see so often when helping people stuck in toxic relationship dynamics. In a world where it has become the l…

1
The Impact Of Your Inner Work On Your Children 4:11

12M ago4:11

4:11

Imagine it was 40 years ago. And your parents were about to make an important decision. They were sitting on an opportunity to help them heal a part of themselves. They were on the precipice of deciding if NOW is the time to resolve some of their childhood wounding. The wounding that had them feeling like they were "not enough”. The wounding that h…

1
Shame is the Main Hurdle in the Path of Healing 3:33

1y ago3:33

3:33

In 2018, I remember hating what I saw when I looked in the mirror. Shame— that feeling of being “inherently bad inside” the feeling behind the reason people end their lives…. Is not something we are born with: It’s something we are born INTO. Like a fish being born into a fishbowl of dirty water, we take on the shame of cultural norms we are raised…

1
How Co-Dependent Marriage Impacts Children 5:50

1y ago5:50

5:50

In the book “Laws of Human Nature” by Robert Greene, he summarizes in a beautiful way the focus of my life’s work: Think back to your younger self-- growing up as a child (if you can remember it): In the first 3 or 4 years our brains are especially malleable. We experience emotions much more intensely, creating memory traces that are much deeper th…

1
How To Help a Kid With Anxiety 2:23

1y ago2:23

2:23

Like millions of parents out there, Jenny had an anxious kid. The worst part of seeing our kids struggle with anxiety is the feeling of powerlessness we have. We just want them to know they’re going to be ok. “Calm down” “Take deep breaths” “don’t be anxious” are likely things your parents said to you when you were younger and dealing with your fea…

1
The Willingness Of Imperfection (While On Daddy Duty) 1:22

1y ago1:22

1:22

Take a moment to reflect on how boundaries were modelled to you growing up. Were you punished for sharing them? Guilted into removing them? In my family system, they weren’t really taught to us elegantly. I’m not even blaming my parents, either. We can’t lead others where we have never been. In persian culture, it’s considered rude to set boundarie…

1
From Dissociation to Reconnection 17:01

1y ago17:01

17:01

There’s a hidden root cause behind most of our relationship challenges. And it’s not about the “other” person. It’s something more insidious. In fact you can’t even feel it most of the time. Most of us who are stuck in relationship dynamics that feel toxic, living in a “should I stay or go” situation are painfully unaware that there’s something dee…

1
How Fantasy Affects Your Relationships 1:58

1y ago1:58

1:58

What are your fantasies? At first glance, you might be thinking that I’m talking about sexuality and fetishes. I’m not. I’m talking about the root cause of our Trauma Bonds. Picture this: you grow up in a childhood where you experienced the wounding of: abuse, loss, abandonment rejection (bullying) emotional neglect, maturing too early, or shaming……

1
How a Child Becomes the Narcissist 3:53

1y ago3:53

3:53

These days my inbox is inundated with people telling me how their ex is a narcissist. And I get it, too. I’m married now in a secure bond that’s polarized, but when I was unpacking the sh*t show that was my last relationship I was in, I was surprised to discover that I was in a “trauma bond” and went down the rabbit hole through the Manual that psy…

1
A Man’s Two Greatest Fears In Relationships 26:53

1y ago26:53

26:53

If you’re a man, or you’re in a relationship with a man, you’re wise to learn about the two fundamental fears every man contends with in relationships. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ P.S. Remember, the end of a trauma bond isn't just an ending; it's the beginn…

1
Being Self-Centered vs Not Giving a F### 26:10

1y ago26:10

26:10

A participant of my recent 3 hour training on Fawning had a few questions that arose. She’s in a “should I stay or go” situation and has been consuming my content and has now begun her pathway to creating a secure relationship. Here are some more questions: What happens when you try to finally set boundaries, and then get blamed, criticized, and re…

1
Healing Your Nervous System Can Save Your Life 15:48

1y ago15:48

15:48

A ruptured attachment can be lethal. In the last 3 years, I’ve had several participants send me DM’s after they attended one of my events to tell me “Thank you. I wanted to end my life before this…. this was my last hope. I had already made the plans. I can now let my family know that things are going to be ok.” I get emotional just thinking about …

1
Healing Enmeshment Trauma 7:58

1y ago7:58

7:58

I just had a frustrated commenter (Carol) on my facebook page. She said “I could care less about having a relationshit”. It’s not worth the BS and the hoop jumping, and the fact that no one cares about boundaries. Single is peace.” I just wanted to jump through the inter webs and give her a hug. Too many people these days can relate to this. Relati…

1
Anxious Attached To Finding A Secure Connection 8:33

1y ago8:33

8:33

We’ve had over 100,000 people do our attachment-style quiz that helps you determine your attachment style. Guess what the most common attachment style has been?? Nope, not “avoidant”. Those who identify as “avoidant” will often “avoid" the discomfort of looking inward and doing the quiz. Not too many avoidants. The answer is “anxious attached”— AKA…

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